And now I indulge in some personal introspection.

I haven't seen my therapist, Michael, for a while, but I think I've internalized him on the familiar issues we've talked about over the years. So I know what he would say about the recent communication with my sister. I got an email from her today, no personal message, just a forwarded long-winded screed (from my other sister) about all the horrible things Obama has done in his first 5 months in office, and suggesting that GW Bush never would have gotten away with so many gaffes and so much incompetence. It's kind of funny really. It's goes to show what an altered universe is Fox News. So I bounced the email back to her unanswered and contemplated, for a fraction of a second, writing a thoughtful and sincere response, asking her to disengage from conflict, try to agree to relate on some other level--civilly, gently. Which brings me back to my therapist, who would say, at this moment, "Ah, I see you're holding out hope again." Which I know is futile. The sisterly relationship I've always wanted was never there, so I'm not longing for something I've lost, but something I never had. And, in truth, I have a great life. My husband loves me, and I him. My daughters are incredible, independent, competent, loving, compassionate women. What more could I ask for?

As for my sister, it's not that I can't abide someone with different political views, but rather that there is no common ground on which she is willing to engage without competition and disagreement. Why is it that some people seem to live for conflict? Why the compulsion to insult, to denigrate, to engage with someone only to abuse them? I suppose it's nothing more than garden-variety bullying. And that's why my inner Michael advises me to disengage, cut my losses, move on, be grateful that the family I have is the one I've built, not the one I was born into.